Ruptured

Images of you become increasingly distant,

memories are strange when you are a stranger.

Everything I was, I am now and will be,

is visited on me and threaded together,

ubiquitously from a different vantage point.

You were to me a ludicrous picture and desire,

but for those few precious fleeting moments I had it.

Hopes to live an idyll life was it an unrealistic ideal,

a dichotomy of separation from dreams and reality?

O God, give me back the day that was stolen from me.

I was confronted by something unutterable;

Your impassive nonchalance and idea of euphemism,

your perfunctory ridicule, it was all epiphany to me.

You ruptured a passage and through this imbroglio,

abandoned and left me stranded inside a no man's land.

All fear, uncertainty and despair dissolved;

This feeling embraces me, comforts me and opposes me.

It is determined to keep myself from existentialism,

from spending the remaining years of my life on life-support,

transfused against loneliness and only pretending to be alive.

-Mok