What a splendid evening I had today with my friends. Tkoh, Ivan, Chun, Zhen and me had gathered at Tkohs place and met for dinner at Crystal Jade Xiao Long Bao. God, we had a real good chat immediately after Tkoh and Chun touched down in SG after a good o’ 3 months. Some funny things to note about our conversation:
We were talking about the GF(s) Tkoh had, how it started and ended and when talking about his most recent GF:
Tkoh: My last gf was a bitch man.
Us: Why?
Tkoh: She dumped me.
Me: Dumping you doesn’t make her a bitch
Tkoh: Any girl that dumps me is a bitch.
Us: . . . Right. How she dump you?
TKoh: While I was in the canteen eating one day, she called me on the phone and said something like we need some time apart, and her grades was suffering
Us: Right. Bitch
Tkoh: You know 6 months after that, she remove me from her block list on MSN, and she wanted to patch up?
Us: yeah so?
Tkoh: As if I'm going to give her the chance man, not after what she did to me. SHe blocked me!
Ivan: Why Tkoh you should have patch up with her. You know girls initiating the patch will be damn loyal to you one.
Tkoh: Eh no thx man
Ivan: Common! you can go "EH BITCH! WHOIS THE MAN NOW!"
Mok: Ivan! Calm down your fantasizing too much. Hahaha
Ivan: . . . .
Zhen: Damn I saw this damn hot girl on the bus, big boobs and all, but she was a scammer
Mok: What’s a scammer?
Zhen: A person who cheats your feelings and after that leaves you depressed and feeling that life is all bleak and dark
Mok: So how did she scam you? You just met her on the bus today
Zhen: Well, She had big boobs from the side. But when she turned around I realized that it was all empty space between her body and the blouse.
Mok: . . . Right. She scammed you.
During our merriment, coincidentally we met two more of our secondary class mates jacky chan and gene and they added more humor to our talk cock session
Ivan: EH Lionel remember the time Mark Rama and us would go to your house to play your playstation?
Jacky Chan: O ya
Ivan: Well actually Rama’s real intention was to see your dad’s collection (Hidden Porn in the drawer which we discovered)
Jacky Chan: WAH LAU that one was a long time ago ah… Why you still remember!
Us: (Breaks out laughing) Some things you will never forget.
Mok: EH Zhen you were in BB last time right? why you quit?
Zhen: Oh I cannot stand Lincoln man. Buay Ta Han him so i quit.
Mok: O yeah the rugger is it?
Jacky Chan: ARGH Lincoln, everytime I see him I feel like punching his face man (and Lionel goes really berserk, eyes lit with fire, anger in his speech and all. Thats why hes Jacky Chan)
Us: oi Calm down Jacky Chan, relax man!
While using Chuns Laptop we were checking out the Taiwanese girls photos in
Me: Nothing man. I'm just figuring out how the Pgup Pgdn button works. Eh Chun won't you send me this picture after you get home?
Taiwanese girls are amazing. And not soon after we were talking about the difference between Taiwanese girls and SG girls
Mok: EH Tkoh whats the difference ah, which one better?
Tkoh: Definately Taiwan girls man. But than there was some rift between the SG girls and Taiwan girls while I was overseas. Apparently the SG girls thought the TW girls were damn bitchy.
Me: Erm. . So which one more bitchy?
TKoh: All about the same la. So I dunno what the SG girls were complaining about
Me: So which one more conservative?
Tkoh: Definately the Taiwan Girls.
Us: Nice.
Tkoh: But you know, the thing about girls is that they want me to take sides? And I wanna just sit on the fence?
Me: Yeah tell us about it. As how all wars turns out, the only victims are the innocent ones like us. *Laughs*
We were than talking about when we saw our first porn. And than we were talking about our secondary 3 incident at Jeremy Joe’s house where he show us his collection. But than I remembered it was earlier than that while at Secondary 2 at Lam’s house where Lam tried to corrupt our damn guai classmate Garrett with his “Peeping Pete” CD.
Lam: Eh Garrett come come got something interesting to show you
Garrett glaces into the monitor and Lam rapes Garrett of his eye virginity
Lam than breaks out laughing uncontrollably and Garretts runs out of the room embarrassed
Zhen: Remember the time at Burger King we saw this girl with really big boobs and than we all turned to check her out together
Us: Ya what about it
Zhen: Remember Donna’s friend upon seeing her stuff, shouted “OMG DAMN BIG ah”? God, that was embarrassing. It was not even discrete
On our way home from Holland V, we were at the traffic light junction waiting and the green man was flashing. We were like contemplating whether or not to cross the road, undecided. After 20 seconds passed, it was still flashing green, and TKoh said “fuck man if we crossed just now we’ll already be across. Everytime I’m at the flashing green man, and I am just about to step out, it turns red.”
A few more seconds passes, and Tkoh says “AH man I’m gonna cross it now” and takes one step forward. Just at that precise moment, the lights turned red as if playing some sick joke on Tkoh.
Tkoh: AH CRAP see what I mean?
Ivan: Tkoh I think you have some power over lights or something, remember that time when you touched the lamp post, the lights went out?It happened twice already, excluding today's incident.
Us: It must be because of your static electricity from your leg hair. *Laughs*
Tkoh: …..
MAN I love my buddies. They never fail to crack me up
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